my true love is dead and gone, dead and gone to me and i’ve been sleeping all day long, all day long it seems cause i have no friends, have no soul, im a dead end, throw me away throw me away i will leave you for no reason and youre going to break but it’s all because i have bad thoughts in my cloudy head whenever i am awake just come over so i can be with you come over so i’ll have something to do and i’m not in love with you my true love is dead and gone, dead and gone to me and i’ve been sleeping all day long, all day long cause i have no friends, have no soul, im a dead end, throw me away throw me away

at least my solo work’s better than yours here’s to honest music in common chords i started crying on the train to grand central about your dumb songs and the familiar smell of metro north and clementine vodka and words i wish i never said and ways i wish i never felt towards you fumbling around with your dumb friend and me like a bad porn movie he said “in the morning, you’ll be mine” well we fucked alone when your friend fell asleep and i remember it so vividly, when you said it was nothing personal a week later i hear you’re seeing somebody and i hope she makes you happy i hope you’re fucking happy now but sad boys like you never are sad boys like you just like to play bass guitar fucking around with your merch guy and me like a really awful porn movie he whispered, “in the morning, you’ll be mine”

looking in your eyes i know we have a shot of making it to the top of making it to the rock swinging our lives away but looking in your eyes i know that there's a chance we could end in heartbreak and pain we could go right down the drain but isnt it woooooorth it to know that we could someday make it peeeeerrrrrrrrrfect well you bet your ass i'm in it to the end and im just as scared as the day is long yeah im scared as shit of commitment but here we are tell me that one day we're gonna have it all tell me one day you'll fall and one day i'll fall and someday it'll fucking end but isnt it woooooorth it to know that we could someday make it peeeeerrrrrrrrrfect well you bet your ass i'm in it to the end

a few weeks ago i left your batman panties in basil hayden's bed he went to mica a long time ago, i met him on craigslist and i promise this is the last song i'll write that mentions u, you know you are the skin i shed i left a white heart shaped tunnel in his bed as well part of me wore it to remind me of a boy. who? i'll never tell he's got a girlfriend, and for fucking with him, you know i'll go to hell a few nights ago i snorted xanax and dexedrine and bopped straight to work sang “waving thru a window” using my lyft’s aux cord on the way there he said i had a nice voice. well im trying spent the summer of 2017 in twenty pairs of arms, before midnight that’s only cuz, i’ve got work, starting at midnight part of me wants to try monogamy so baaaadly another part of me likes occasionally doing hard drugs for free… that’s fucked up. sorry, mom. sorry, dr. psychiatrist. i love u both but u can catch me doin risky things like its eaaasy i’m gonna die and nobody will have heard my name because i’m hardly made of flesh and my life is a big fucking game you can sleep on the couch while i snore in your bed I don't care, i don't care anymore

i put my spotify on private; listen to every hallelujah i put my heart on hold to think about you because it's cold and it's broken and it’s raining in baltimore too but i belong here, i don’t belong with you sometimes i think ive been loved enough for a lifetime sometimes i think my life isn't big enough for two but at some point it was big enough for the both of us at some point, i was in love with you i’m sorry i didn’t tell you when I found my brother’s gun i’m sorry if you ever felt like it was a competition between you and the darkness inside of me or between the love you gave and were given you always hated the phrase "making love" but that’s okay i know i'll feel the holy dove with someone new you say you wanna update each other on how we're doing but really you just want to brag because ive been having trouble getting out of bed and youre still the one who can really make me sad now you tell me you’re with someone else and i hope you’ve found it the one to scratch you in all the right places the one you can truly forget me with i hope i never see you again i’m sorry i didn’t tell you when I found my brother’s gun i’m sorry if you ever felt like it was a competition between you and the darkness inside of me or between the love you gave and were given see every day is just between my first and my last and every night just reminds me of my past but every morning i wake up and believe it won’t happen again, it won’t happen to me i’m sorry i didn’t tell you when I found my brother’s gun i’m sorry if you ever felt like it was a competition between you and the darkness inside of me or between the love you gave and were given

we do the same few faces in our snaps, like every fucking time i close my eyes and i smile real big you stick your tongue out and shiiiiine or i make my goddamn puppy eyes or you pull yr lower lip a little bit tell your girlfriend what we're doing tell your best friend i kinda miss him, okay? i don't know if you want attention or if you really want to die either way, when you come to me, you know i always have the time i'd like to be in your bed sometime i'd like to just be with you, just lay and lay and lie… we already do that tell your girlfriend what we're saying tell your best friend i kinda miss him tell your girlfriend about our picture tell your best friend i kinda miss him, okayyy i kinda miss him i kinda miss him i’m on a strange wave i’m on a strange wave, baby i’m on a strange wave i’m on a strange wave, daddy i dream about the both of you sometimes never at the same time, of course i’d love you to have you at the same time, of course insert the speak-no-evil monkey emoji here I kinda wanna fuck your boy like we used to but believe me, i wanna fuck you too tell your girlfriend what we're doing tell your best friend i kinda miss him, okay? i kinda miss him i’m on a strange wave it’s in a strange way i’m on a strange wave

I look at your snaps for more than 10 seconds and when i think about you ay night i practically lose my mind i know we just met but i cant stop myself i think its looking pretty nice i want this for all of fucking time the two of us in a little world of our own me sittin by the phone you're probably out with your friends but i dont mind, i dont mind i am here when you want me doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doooo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doooo i know we've got time we're only eighteen i know all your signs i know what they mean it's such a rush feeling this way so easy to get let down when it goes away but sometimes it stays! for a little while or a long, long while you make me smile! doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doooo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doooo

i get makeup on your shirt i get makeup on your cheek no nights spent alone no nights spent alone i let you tie me to the bed i let you get inside my head no nights spent alone no nights spent alone i mean it’s almost every night another boy, another internal fight but no nights spent alone no nights spent alone my songs are too honest all that’s in my trash are clementine peels and used condoms clementine peels and used condoms no nights spent alone no nights spent alone